DON’T GIVE UP, GIVE IN

Lessons from an Extraordinary Life

“People tell me, “You’re such an optimist.” Am I an optimist? An optimist says the glass is half full. A pessimist says the glass is half empty. A survivalist is practical. He or she says, “Call it what you want, but just fill the glass.” I believe in filling the glass. –Louie Silvie Zamperini

“We’re all a little afraid of death, “ Louie said the last time we’d met, when we broached the subject of mortality. “We’re afraid because no matter how old you are you’re always making plans and you don’t want to be interrupted. I’m ninety-seven years old, but after everything that’s happened in my life, I feel as if I’ve lived two hundred years---and I wouldn’t mind two hundred more so that I can keep doing what I’ve been doing.” What he’d been doing, he explained, was “helping the underdog. That’s been my program. That’s been my whole life.”

But devoting your life to good or God, whatever your religion, doesn’t mean instantaneous, nonstop happiness. Hard work lay ahead. I fought despondency and doubt, and tried to come to terms with what had happened to me after years of taking life for granted. My faith grew…the hardest thing in life is to forgive. But hate is self-destructive. If you hate somebody you’re not hurting the person you hate, you’re hurting yourself. Forgiveness is healing.

I’m often asked if, given a chance, I’d live my life the same way again. I have wondered about that as well---for about five seconds. When I think of the juvenile delinquency, injuries, torture, and many near-death experiences, the answer is a definite no. That would be crazy.

Of course, enduring and surviving those challenges led to many years of positive influence which helped neutralize the catastrophes and eventually delivered great rewards. I’ve been honoured and blessed with impossible adventures and opportunities, a wonderful family, friends, and fans all over the world. That I’d gladly repeat. It’s obvious that one part of the story can’t happen without the other. And so I accept it. I am content.

I resolved to not give up and not give in, to keep looking for answers, and to make my life count right up to the last minute. I’m just a grateful survivor who realized I had something to give and became devoted to setting an example for others by being prepared, by having the proper attitude, and by trying to inspire. It wasn’t easy. Sometimes I just got lucky. But I gave it a try. You can too, in your own way, whatever your goal in life. Enjoy. And thank you.---Louie Zamperini, Hollywood, CA July 2014

Family rules: “all for one, one for all…”

Anyone can turn their life around…the difference between attention and recognition is self-esteem. I’d begun to break the negative cycle by taking the first steps to building positive self-esteem through hard work and accomplishments.

Everyone needs that support (as an important element of success)---even if at first you don’t think you do. Look around. See who’s on your side and in your corner. You don’t have to go it alone.

It’s not how you win, it’s how you lose. When the time came to lose, I was determined to do it right. I wanted to lose cheerfully, so I congratulated Bright honestly. I put my arm around him and said, “That was a brilliant race, and you deserved to win.” I had a smile on my face. His mother and father stood there with their mouths open. Then his mother hugged me. That’s the way it should be. If you give everything and you lose, so what? It’s not going to put you int your grave. I walked away knowing I could handle defeat gracefully, and I had more self-esteem from that than from winning the race.

Glenn Cunningham was my hero. I’d read the story of how he’d been severely burned as a child in a fire that killed his older brother. Much of the flesh on his knees and shins was gone. When bandages were changed, pieces of muscle came out. He also lost all the toes on his left foot. Years later, I saw him in the shower and confirmed what I’d read and heard. He was burned on both legs, up to the middle of his back. The doctors thought his chances of walking again were remote. But Cunninghamb was not about to give up. Cunningham epitomized resilience and resolve. He massaged his legs and stimulated blood flow. He endured physical therapy and willed himself to stand and then walk. Soon he began to run. I don’t know how he did it, but he was my inspiration. His perseverance made me realize that if I was willing to make the effort and sacrifices, I could be a champion too. What a great example for any athlete. Cunningham was the greatest ever. I still don’t know any story as compelling as his.

I didn’t know it then, but my persistence, perseverance, and unwillingness to accept defeat when things looked all but hopeless were part of the character traits I would need to make it through World War II alive.

Life on earth is dangerous. You should be prepared for anything. Preparations determines survival. As adults we sometimes encounter circumstances with potentially grave consequences that we can’t anticipate. It can seem overwhelming. But each circumstance can usually be broken into smaller, more manageable challenges that we might already be prepared to deal with….I maintained a positive attitude and kept my mind active. I followed my training, a step at a time. I didn’t freak out. You may feel in your busy life, that learning survival skills will require too much time that you don’t have. Maybe you figure you’ll never need them. But you only have one life. You should never be too busy to save it. Education is the mainstay of being prepared. …Anything can happen to anybody…Survival, in any situation, form the outdoors to the office, depends on education, preparation, and anticipation. You’ve got to think ahead.

I’ll say this again: You only have one life. You should never be too busy to save it.

Keep your mind sharp. Every day we put our brains through their paces, but the older we get the more it’s necessary. You have to stay active. Engage with others. Don’t sit and vegetate in front of the television. Move you r body. Use your head. “The brain is a muscle. It’s essential to exercise it or it will atrophy.” Despite hunger, thirst, heat, desperation, weight loss, boredom, and ravenous sharks, I worked my brain whever I could. I hate mathematics, but I’d lie there and add up a column of figures in my head. The I’d try a double column. I may not have gotten the right answers, but I wasn’t letting my brain go to sleep. ..Don’t forget to laugh. Life is serious stuff. Laughter helps us make it through. The best humour is based on turht when it lets us acknowledge an uncomfortable or unmentionable yet common experience. You feel better if only for a moment.

Don’t give up, don’t give in. I wouldn’t give up hope. Not my style. I would do whatever I had to do to survive. Never let anyone destroy your dignity. I decided to consider my incarceration as a challenge---like winning a race. That gave me purpose. Sure, I wished I were home with my family, but I had to deal with reality….I never complained. I just got knocked down, bled, got up, got knocked down, bled, got up. I expected it. I wouldn’t let it get me down. Sometimes it took me two days to recover, but I always had a positive attitude. Steely, but positive. No way he would break me….The great lesson in life is perseverance. Never give up.

Hate is a personal decision. When I counseled troubled kids, I found that they had lots of serious hate: for their situations, sometimes their families, society, the rules, and often themselves. I knew from my own experience that there is a twisted kind of satisfaction that comes form hating. You hate and hate and hate, and think you’re getting even by hating. But it’s a ruse. It’s a cover-up. Hate destroys---but not the object of your hatred. It destroys you. Hate is more damaging than alcoholism. Alcoholism is a disease. Hate is a personal decision. …Maybe so, but that was the past. He had his whole life ahead of him, but he couldn’t embrace the present or the future. His hate had destroyed his spirit. If you cling to the axe you’re grinding, eventually you’ll only hurt yourself.

“hero” is an easy word for people to use and maybe overuse. These days anyone who does anything that involves encountering danger is called a hero….I have nothing but the greatest respect for someone who puts themselves in harm’s way for another, and for those who do good deeds abobve and beyond the call of duty, like being a teacher or doctor where most fear to tread.

You have to work for the betterment of everyone. You must have hope….He may have made it home alive, but to me he didn’t make it. You must have hope. It rejuvenates your whole being. You can’t allow negative thinking---even if you know your chances are slim. I’m not saying that it’s easy to do, but the ability to envision the road to successful completion is what keeps you alive. Hope provides the power of the soul to endure.

DON’T ASK WHY, ASK WHAT’S NEXT? My attitude is just to accept it. It is what it is. Instead of getting all caught up in asking “why?”, I ask “What’s next?” That’s all you have to know. If you can’t control your attitude, forget it. You’re going to heal slowly or die young. I cause less stress for everyone, including me. Having a positive attitude pays off in ways that you can’t even imagine, yet stay forever in your memory. You choose how to view your fate.

It’s a beautiful life. Everything you’ll have to do to survive is an accomplishment.

The secret of contentment: you have to accept everything. If you can make that attitude part of who you are then nothing can bother you. It might be tough at first, but it soon becomes a habit… Now we had to do everything to survive. I didn’t argue with what had happened, or imagine “if only” alternatives. I accepted our situation and let my training take over. I was “in control” of myself because I accepted things; to begrudge them was a waste of time and energy. Acceptance made it easier for me to deal with what I had to do to stay alive moment by moment, day by day. You must work willingly with what you have. Why make it tough on yourself and others by having a bad attitude?...Acceptance creates cheerfulness, which in turn creates contentment. Attitude is everything.

Don’t leave the crucial details to others. …Know when you’ve done all you can.

First, you listen. You have to “really” listen. Listening is a sign of strength. If you want to help you have to show a genuine interest, emphasis on genuine, and focus in. Folks will talk if they trust you. I made it my priority to be available at any time. I resisted being judgmental; that only creates opposition. That’s not helpful. Let them decide for themselves. Then try to help them do it. Then say, “Congratulations. You figured it out.” Goals are not enough. Accomplishment is the key to self-respect.

If someone said, “I can’t do it” we’d work with them until they got it. The main thing in life is to be able to accomplish something. You have one purpose now. Just don’t be afraid to make mistakes; they are the stepping stones to success. Challenge yourself: learn to adapt. You can’t give up. You have to use unrelenting determination and exercise a positive attitude. The measure of a person of worth is based on how each lives life each day, and what she or he contributes rather than takes from society. Commitment and perseverance pay off.

People often ask me what I’ve learned in life that is worth remembering and passing on. Here’s something I say, especially to young people: It will be tough to amount to anything unless you commit to your goal and stay on course. You can’t give in to doubt. You can’t gie in to pain. Becoming your best self doesn’t just happen. You have to reach deep within yourself to discover if you’re willing to make the necessary sacrifices. If not, choose another goal, and ask the question again.This is the great lesson of my life: Never give up. This requires perseverance. If you’re on the right track, stay on that path until you’ve finished.

We can’t all be champions, but we can give whatever is in us to give.

Awareness equals survival. Awareness saves your life. I already know where I am going---I size up the situation, think of the consequences, and that is the answer to all the choices we make and to all survival in this world. It is called ‘wisdom.’

Forgiveness is the healing factor. When you forgive you have to let go. True forgiveness is complete and total. Of all the wonderful results of changing my life, perhaps the best is my ability to forgive ~ By Louis Zamperini and David Rensin,